Untitled V

It’s not always wine and roses.
It’s blindfolds and handcuffs.
I am drawn to everything wild
And beautiful
And strange
That struggles to bloom
In dark desolate places.
I crave deep intimacy
And i do not mean physically. 
Wrap your dark around me
And pour your soul
Into my mouth,
I want to get drunk on you tonight.
I’m trying to learn
To come up for air
Every so often
Careful not to drown myself
In someone else
But I don’t pick my poison,
My poison picks me.
When I met you
I was afraid to like you.
I liked you
And I was afraid to love you.
I loved you
And now I’m afraid to lose you.
I’m afraid
That I’m just another girl
And this is just another story.
I’m not afraid to love,
I’m afraid of not being loved back.
I feel myself falling
Faster and faster
Between heaven and disaster.
Won’t you be my livewire,
Make me feel like I’m set on fire,
Let you take me higher and higher.
Two messed up people together
Isn’t always bound to end badly,
They save each other.
There are so many unspoken words between us
But this love tainted
With darkness and sadness
Is all the love
I know how to give.
You are
Everything and nothing
Like what I have waited for,
Familiar as a perennial weed
Harboured in my stomach.
I wouldn’t call us soulmates yet
But we are definitely soulmights.
Your name is on my blade;
If I try to say goodbye
I will choke,
If I try to leave
I will stumble.
I never want to stand there
And watch you walk away
From everything we have.
In this cold world
When someone shows you love,
It means something
Especially because
It’s not like anyone gets me
And I didn’t want
To fill the emptiness
By just settling.
But with you, 
Everything makes sense,
Everything falls into place
You are a thousand colours
When the world
Has faded into shades of grey.
No one ever let’s me love them
As much as I want to
But you do.
Sometimes you never know
The value of a moment
Until it becomes
A memory
That you wish you could experience again.
The only good part
Is that memories never die.
Sometimes you have to be apart
From people you love 
But that does not mean
You love them any less,
You love them even more.
And when I eventually lose you
As death and the nature of man
Have promised me I will,
I shall write you
Like the beautiful poem
That you are.
Most times i will cry my heart out
But whenever I can
I will hold back the tears
Like a big girl.


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